Well well, the new year and.. nothing has changed.
Honestly speaking.. I’ve got plenty which I want to do (since forever) but haven’t really gone around doing it because let’s get realistic, money plays a role. When I feel like my money in the account is dropping low, I’ll try to stay indoors because what’s the point heading out torturing myself while I see stuff which I can’t buy? Then again, why is it so that when you’re financially tied down (due to the insane eating habits maybe), you tend to see plenty of pretty things which you tell yourself “is a must-get once the pay is in”? And when the money is in, there’s just NOTHING that fits/worth buying :(
One of the resolutions for the 2012 will be to get things done. In a sense whereby I’ll really work towards things that I want/want to happen. Trip, yes! Telling myself to hang on for a few more months and I’ll have sufficient cash for my month long trip, so no whining allowed till then. Eyes & ears shut, see and hear none! Work towards aussie and not get swayed by anything. Determination, go me!
Moving on..! Another will be to mind my own business. Should try not to put myself in any situation I might not be wanted. So yea, friends who know me by now will understand that they can come to me when they need someone to talk whenever they are ready. Trying to stay indoors more often, do my stuff, pack up a little. Be a little more “homely” and “tidy”. Let just see how long this thing can last yea?
Anyway, another food for thought.. Guess I’m a pretty hostile person when it comes to the “first meeting” (girl that close friend likes and decides to bring her to meet the crew). Hey, I know I should be more out-going, cheerful and all that nonsense but c’mon, I thought you (close friends) should know that I’m more nonsense-talking only when I get comfortable with the person, so.. I’ve come to a conclusion.
I’m not gonna bother asking when, but remember this, if it’s only when you’re “ready”, don’t expect me to be over the top and act like how I am around you guys during the first meeting cos it’s human to get used to things/people/pets/anything. Aside to that, sorry if you feel that I don’t talk much or gives a so-called “black face”, to be honest, I was and am offended by that statement. Cos seriously, if I don’t give two fucks about us being friends, and let’s just get realistic that when we bring someone new to meet the crew, it’s said so that we can “get to know one-another”, in short it’s just like another “judgement day”, to see if he/she is worth and suitable. So say I’m protective of my friends, cos if I were to act differently, it speaks a lot of our friendship. Okay, bottom line, brings me back to my second resolution minding my own business, and it’s up to my business if I want to introduce someone new in my life in the near future.
Life is short, so well, suck it up and life goes on. It’s not gonna wait for anyone.
